Nicky Leigh

DEPRESSION – Through the fire

6 – 22 October 2009

Hope

New Heaven, New Earth. Oil on canvas. 270 x 240cm
New Heaven, New Earth. Oil on canvas. 270 x 240cm
Extract from my testimony

“My strength is made perfect in weakness”
2 Corinthians 12:9

The comforting revelation in these words by Jesus is that the Lord not only fully accepts our weakness but also embraces it. Because of our weakness we realize our limitations and are forced to be humble and accept that we cannot do it alone. In our desperation we reach out and let God work througn us. God says it is ok to be there. I love you and I am with you. Have faith as you go through the fire and I will refine you to my perfection. Once we are humbled God may work in us to overcome our weakness. But it is important to remain humble and receptive to God’s voice, always acknowledging our dependence.

All else pales in significance when illuminated by the light of God’s love expressed through others. All achievements become insignificant when compared with love and compassion. All our self-importance becomes laughable in this context. I believe that this life is very significant but a small part of the whole. This world is very focused on the temporary and does not always understand the importance of suffering that, I believe, equips us for eternity. Jesus went through the agony of feeling that God was not with him. His words while dying on the cross.

“My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?
Matthew 27:46

Reflect his utter and profound despair. I know I often felt so separate and fragmented - desperately in need of people but unable to be around anyone. Unable to communicate my suffering and distorted thoughts. Unable to receive comfort or feel love for myself or anyone else. Numb and tormented in my frightful cell. But above all, I felt abandoned by and doubted the existence of God.

Do not be fooled by the world’s idea of success, as it is not the same as God’s victory over the eternal battle within. The fire that does not destroy will purify. Let me end by remembering the victorious words of our Lord

“These things I have spoken to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world”.
John 16:33

Extract from testimony given at Dove fellowship 2 October 2005 N.Leigh